La Triste Relación (Poem)
Everything that I’ve done has led me to this,
a decaying vessel that should not exist.
I was born on a dark moon in the east most of Spain,
to a mother that left me for debts she must pay.
And every word i learned was for my queen,
the protecter of sorrows to keep the world clean.
And all through my life I just learned from the sword,
the gun was my father and death was my lord.
When word spread of a new world to steal,
I jumped at the bargain of this new deal.
San lucar was the port I have dreamt all my life
and the five ships that lay there were to be my wife.
The voyage was long and full of disease,
the ocean was fearsome and too hard to please.
With every new island we were met with pain,
the men were deserting even despite the shame.
600 strong when we left left that blessed land,
300 weak and most cannot stand.
Florida was going to change our fate,
but more death lay there and now we can wait.
So the decision was made to split up the men,
we followed the coast for nothing but when
the greatest of storm lay our bruised ship ashore,
the company of 80 could not take much more.
Cabeza De Vaca he was our guide,
a brave noble man with undying pride.
The natives were friends and foes alike,
but cherished our leader for his deep sight.
This land of Texas was crude and ill,
but had a strange power that all men could feel.
One day as we led the horses to drink,
a young native women sank into my dreams.
She knew I was worn and seeking bliss,
she gave me a trail that I can’t resist.
With three men with me and her as my guide,
we chased Rio Blanco deeper inside.
When the river dried out to just a small creek,
the water grew dark and we could not drink.
Tired from our journey we all went to sleep,
our dreams stopped by the sound of mens feet.
They tied us up and they cut at our feet,
demanded we tell them what we came to seek.
The sickest one of us was so close to dead,
they shortened his journey and cut off his head.
The other two men began to spit and curse,
they met a fate that could not be worse.
They took me their insides and screamed in my face,
demanded again what I came to chase.
Before i could speak a knife plunged in my gut,
it wasn’t deep but i knew twas enough.
The native girl then let out a great shout,
she had cut through her ropes and she quickly ran out.
The men they gave chase and left me alone,
I seized at the chance that girl had shown.
As a divine guidance i knew where to go,
my feet where bloody, my body was slow.
I made a great distance between me and the tribe,
my path became clear yet so hard to describe.
I crested a hill to a large open field,
the late afternoon sun was comfort to feel.
And near the edge, to a dark lonesome wood,
was a small pit, with two guards that stood.
It was an old man who shook while he spoke,
and a boy child hidden under his cloak.
He told me he knew that I would arrive,
a sacred place he guarded and i can’t come inside.
Frustrated at the sight of this four foot hole,
I yelled at the old man can this save my soul.
He shook his old hands and told me to go,
I strangled him there and threw his body low.
The child with great fear leapt in to the trees,
a regret washed over me with the new breeze.
My blood dark and flowing from its wound,
I fell in the pit and made it my tomb.
As soon as my back touched the soft ground,
there was a blinding flash and a deep sound.
I was pulled to a place that I will try to describe,
streets made of tar and steel chariots ride.
Down the road, the old meadow remained,
but in the field many children played.
People moved on this old sacred land,
like it was nothing under their great plan.
And then appeared a man who knew my name,
his eyes where all black and so full of pain.
He said I had took him here so long ago,
I told him he is a man that i do not know.
Then there appeared a great black screen,
that showed us events from creation to unseen.
As shocked as i was at this new insight,
I begged for the old me and my old life.
The Man and I now back where I last stood,
he said his good byes and entered the wood
I stood for a year and watched my body decay,
this brave conquistador just rots away.
I stood for a day, i stood for a week,
i stood for there for years with no words to speak.
One day that child now so old and grown,
came to bury the old man that he left alone.
And a deep shock run all across his face,
as I stand there arrogant, in this sacred place.
The warrior grab his knife and said he is unafraid,
he inched his way closer tight to his blade.
The warrior angry kicked dirt from the ground,
I didn’t move my feet, I didn’t make a sound.
He shouted to me "demon why don’t you care”.
I told him my new name, please call me the mare.